About Me

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Georgia, United States

Tuesday, January 11, 2011

Perceptions.........

Before I get into this, let me add something to my earlier post............in case you were wondering.

My kid didn't get to go out and enjoy the snow again today. He was still under the weather, so I thought it best to not chance him getting really sick. He hasn't been the healthiest kid in his life. He's had severe allergy issues that he continues to have to get shots for. And one of the hardest things for me to personally deal with when he moved back into my house........it was making him sick. I was SO happy to have him here, and yet my home wasn't healthy for him. I wound up having to get the duct work really cleaned out of dust, mold and whatnot. It was very painful so see him go through that because of me. I felt worthless.

Ok....now to the story at hand. I feel I need to make a few things clear. Or at least, as clear as I can make them.

I started this blog for ME. I see it as a way to keep myself on track, and also to see where I've been through this process. It's cathartic for me.....a way to cleanse or purge these feelings and emotions I'm going to be going through.

I don't do it as a "HEY! Look at me!" kind of thing. Not for a group of people, nor any one person. I certainly knew what the perceptions might be when I started this. I'm not a stupid person. But I can't worry over that. Therefore, I felt that I should put a squash on it as early as possible. I can also hope that other people get something out of it along the way, but not a concern.

I'm going through all of this for me and my kid........nobody else. If my relationships with other people get better because of it, all the better. In fact, I hope they do. But again, not my initial concern.

If it seems I talk about certain things a lot, it's because I think about those things (or people) a lot. I can't censor myself when I'm laying my thoughts out here. Whatever pops into my head as i type, that's what makes it to the page. What would I get out of it if I didn't do it that way?

I hope people take the ride with me. But, I can't and won't change what I say based on their perceptions. It's not for them. It's for me.

So, you may read some things here you don't like. You may see pictures or videos you don't like. You may even see one of the occasional "7 naughty words". If I get to be too "real" for you, you may leave at any time. I wish you as much safety on your journey as I hope to get on mine.

2 comments:

  1. It's a delicate balance when you live your life out loud, my friend. You want to be authentic and you want to be honest and transparent but you also don't want to intentionally hurt anyone. Now... if someone judges your writing style... too bad for them. It's your heart, your playground, your story and if they don't like it, that's what the little red x in the upper right is for. There have been times that people have come to me and asked me to not reveal details of my life that leave them a little more exposed than they would like and I try to honor those wishes in most cases. My ex has asked me not to discuss his sons so I don't much, even though I loved them as if they were my own babies. I try not to curse so as not to embarass my brother or daddy... I try not to be sexually explicit so as not to embarass my children... and that sort of thing. You'll find your balance. It takes practice. The important thing is, you have a mission and you're moving forward with it.

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  2. Heather's right, Marvin! Keep it real! I'm enjoying your writing style! Move forward, and know that your blog is for you, not anyone else! If it helps someone else in the process it's a bonus. They need to consider the overall content !

    =) Keep smile'n dude!

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